Monday, December 14, 2009

The Flip Side of Pride

Only the proud probably know this, but the flip side of pride is doubt. Self-doubt, to be specific.

This is important to know. Not so you can go around wigging out proud people. That would be fun, but hardly Christ-like.

No, it's important because everyone is plagued by self-doubt. Everyone.

Every time I hand my manuscript over to someone new, every time I post a comment on a message board, every time I write a post in this, my own blog, I struggle with how it will be perceived. When I reply to an email, I worry I'll be misunderstood.

Why? Because pride and doubt are the same thing: an intense focus on self.

Let this be a ray of hope to all you insecure folks out there. You, too, can appear just as proud as I do (if you wish). Here's how.

When I was young, I was told most people have no idea what they're doing most of the time. For this reason, when you walk into a room, act like you know what you're doing, and most folks will believe you do. Why? 'Cause they don't have a clue, either.

I cannot remember who told me this. It must have been someone I trusted.

This has been my SOP in new situations for most of my life. It works. When I was young, I was bossy, arrogant and proud when I did this. As I've matured and learned to inject a good dose of self-directed humor into situations, I am often perceived as confident and self-assured. This could not be further from the truth.

So, that's the secret. When you encounter the proud, bossy, arrogant person (or the calm, self-assured, in control person), realize - she's just as terrified as you are. She just hides it better.

I've focused a lot on pride this week. I wonder what God's trying to tell me.

1 comment:

  1. I've always been so self-douting and insecure, I never realized how prideful I am. Until, in one of those great moments when I was just taking dictation, someone in my book told the main character how prideful she is. Then I realized everything being said to her could be said of me also. It's occurred to me that maybe the only reason for that book was to teach me how arrogant and prideful I am.

    ReplyDelete