I recently heard an interview that resonated with me with Joe Dispenza on Diary of a CEO podcast. Since my recovery journey began Dec 16, 2019 and re-energized in 2023, I've focused on positive thinking instead of negative thinking. Daily gratitude. Recognizing and redirecting dark thoughts. Using my mind to help the situation instead of making it worse.
I've enjoyed some success. Most of the time, I'm enjoying the moments. Part of it is because I punish bad thinking with exercise. Quite effective.
I bought Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself because that's exactly what I've been trying to do for five years. The first chapter is about quantum physics. Random number theory: I just read In My Time of Dying by Sebastian Junger where he talks about quantum physics as a possible explanation for seeing his dead father while he was near death himself.
So far, the chapter for me has more in common with the New Testament than science. Renewing the mind. The power of prayer. Transformation on a subatomic level. Substitutionary restitution (I'm getting that wrong, but menopause brain won't give me the correct phrase).
One sentence: How many times have you tried to create something, thinking in your mind the end result was possible but feeling in your heart it wasn't?
That's my prayer life for a while now. I know all things are possible, but I feel that some things are not good, even if they seem good in the short term. Maybe this is spiritual maturity. Maybe it's cowardice. Maybe it's lack of faith.
I no longer know what is good and what isn't result-wise. That - I think - is wisdom. I know when I want to complain, I should not complain because I don't know what's coming.
Dispenza may be full of it (some online detractors certainly think so) but he's making a lot of sense in chapter one. We'll see how it goes.
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the Universe, who mercifully restores my soul within me. Great is Your faithfulness.