Writing is a journey, not a destination.

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Friday, April 27, 2012

Almost Time

Last night, I ordered my first copies of Star of Justice. They'll be here in about a week. That was a weird feeling.

TT: I'll have 13 for sale with this first order, so hands up, people, if you want one from me right away.

Retail looks to be $13.98 for the print version and $6.99 for the ebook (if you buy one from me, it'll probably be $15 to help cover the shipping). If you aren't within walking distance of me, you can buy a print or ebook copy from Amazon.com or Barnes and Noble.com. Smashwords.com sells all versions of ebooks.

I've added a link (it's the book cover) in the upper left corner to Splashdown's bookshop. I think Grace gets a better deal if you order from her, and you'll have a chance to see/buy all the other fabulous Splashdown books from authors/friends Caprice Hokstad, Diane Graham, Kat Heckenbach, Keven Newsome et al.

I'm finally getting a excited in a good way. I'm sure it will turn to nausea soon enough, but I'm trying to enjoy it before then.

May 1st (that's next Tuesday if you check the calendar) is the big day. Thanks for all your support!

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Let Me Explain

My lack of desire to be published, indeed my abject terror as the day approached, has led more than one person to raise an eyebrow and wonder, "Then why are you?"

Please allow me to explain. Again.

In my mid-30's, I watched one of those PBS snippets about a 97 year old woman who lived on a farm, milked her own goats, kept chickens and illustrated children's books. I thought, "I want that. I want to be like that when I'm 97. I mean, if I intend to live to 111, I should be doing something and that is right up my alley."

When you're in your mid-30's, hopefully you've figured out the only way to make an idea into reality is to do something. You make a plan. You execute the plan. I didn't want to be published, but if I wanted to be 97 years old writing books with my goats and chickens I would have to first write books and then publish them. I was ahead by one, because I'd already written a book.

So, the publishing.

I remembered my master's class. There we sat on the very first day looking at the course requirements for graduation. They were incredibly daunting. I don't remember all of them but they included 500 face-to-face client contact hours and an hours' long written test plus a huge thesis paper.

Our professor - a therapist himself - smiled. "I know it looks bad. I know it seems daunting right now, but keep in mind you have two years to do all this. The test isn't tomorrow. The paper isn't due next week. You'll do a little every day and when you finally get there, you'll be ready."

He was right. We all made it through.

So I just had to make those writing goals and walk toward them a little every day and when it happened, I'd be ready.

Not so much. Although my mind is set that this is the thing to do, my emotions have tried every possible route to stop me cold. I keep moving forward, and I've finally stopped crying every night and resumed eating normally, but this is purely an exercise of will, as in I will do it. I'm really hoping it gets easier each time. This is not the weight-loss program I would recommend.

Oh, and we're on track for a May 1st release date for Star of Justice print and ebooks through Smashwords, Amazon and Barnes & Noble. I'll get the front cover up here shortly so you can all see the awesome job Keven Newsome did.

Friday, April 20, 2012

How Honest Can I Get?

I don't blog as much as I once did. Part of it is the new job. Not only is a majority of my energy going to learning new skills, but I'm fairly exhausted at the end of the day from dealing with people.

TT: Introverts can learn to deal with people quite well but it takes a lot out of us.

Also thanks to the new job, I can't listen to the radio during the day. I don't have time to catch up on what I missed at night, so my "information feed" and, consequently, my thoughts on current events have dried up. I just don't know as much as I did about the world last year.

TT: I've been a lot calmer the past 8 months.

Blogger changed its format, and, frankly, I hate it. I hate it a lot, so I don't enjoy blogging as much. It doesn't look any different to you out there, but in here it's a whole new bag of worms, and they're an ugly, slimy, prickly mess.

Last but not least, I've pre-edited myself. The one thing I should be blogging about - my experience with upcoming publication - I have not shared because my experiences could distress my friends and family (and publisher) and make me appear to be not only the weirdest person on the planet, but also the most ungrateful, spoiled, whiny mother of a dog who can type English. Meaning, the one topic weighing most heavily on my mind is the one topic I refuse to tackle in print.

Hence, the silence.

I suppose this post is my deliberation on whether I should change that.

Once upon a time, I knew for a fact no one read this blog. I wrote anything and didn't care. I'd like to think I did so in a professional manner, but I was way more honest than I have been lately. I don't reach millions, but I reach a few people I care about very much, and I don't want to do or say anything that would reflect badly on them.

I've suffered a lot this year. Scary-to-me stuff got piled on my plate and I didn't know what to do with it. I've taken it to God - daily - but I miss writing about it. There is a catharsis in writing down my truth and hitting "publish." There's also a risk and it's the risk I haven't wanted to handle.

Anyway, that's me this morning. Maybe I'll tell you more later. Maybe I won't.

I do love and appreciate all of you, dear readers. My one desire is to be worthy of your trust.